Jessica Alba Loves Andy

A little while ago, I realized that I was getting about 3 or 4 hits a day of people who were looking for Jessica Alba pictures. They all ended up being linked to this post: Weekend in LA.

On that page is a picture of Andy with Jessica Alba because they ended up eating at Boa at the same time and Andy asked for a picture.

It's one of Andy's proudest moments.

So a little while ago I tried going to http://images.google.com and typed "Jessica Alba Andy".

You know what the very first picture was? That's right..this one!!

Jessica Alba and Andy at BOA

For the last 2 months, this has been one of Andy's proudest achievements. He shows everyone. This last weekend when I was in Vegas, he says to our friend Mimi and he does our favorite image search.

His picture is no longer there! Noooooooooooooooooooooo...

Google must have changed their indexing/searching algorithm. Not only is Andy's picture no longer first. But it doesn't show up at all.

Andy was devastated. Andy is no longer famous. He is just another creepy guy who bothered a star when they were trying to have a quiet dinner.

To help a brother out, this is my quest to get him back on the search results. Not only that, I want it when you do a search for "Jessica Alba Loves Andy" you get this picture.

Jessica Alba Loves Andy

Because Jessica Alba really does love Andy.

At least that's what Andy tells himself when he's alone at home...in the dark...weeping softly to himself.

So my hope is posting the pictures a couple of more times and renaming it to "JessicaAlbaLovesAndy" will improve his chances of showing up in the search results. Good luck Andy. Jessica's waiting for you.

p.s. Any google search experts out there who can give some tips to accelerate getting this in search results. Let me know.

Jessica Alba Loves Andy

Thank God for the ban...

A federal judge on Tuesday banned the teaching of intelligent design as an alternative to evolution by Pennsylvania's Dover Area School District, saying the practice violated the constitutional ban on teaching religion in public schools.

Full article here.

I'm clearly not a religious guy. I don't have anything against people who are religious, although I don't really believe in a lot of the teachings of organized religions.

But when I see religious people trying to shove it down people's throats...it's one of my greatest social pet peeves and it drives me crazy.

But crazy in a way that sometimes I like it when I'm at a social gathering and someone tries to shove religion at me. Because I relish taking their speal and shoving it up their ass in front of people and embarassing them a bit.

The worst was when I had an ex girlfriend tell me:

GF: Will, I'm worried about you
Will: Why?
GF: Cause you're going to hell
Will: Huh?
GF: I'm sorry, but it's true.
Will: Huh?
GF: You don't believe Jesus died for your sins
Will: Huh? F@ck...no wonder we are not having sex.

OK, the conversation didn't go exactly like that. But she did end up saying I was going to hell. And no..we were not having sex.

My bad trip

I had about the worst travel experience of my life earlier this week (yes..this post isn't about drugs).

I was in New Jersey for a 2 hour meeting on Tuesday. It was an important meeting so I don't mind having to fly across the country for a 2 hr meeting.

The trip there on Monday was uneventful. Drove and parked at SFO (SF airport), jumped on a 4.5 hr flight to Newark, NJ and then had a car take me to my hotel. It was about a 50 mile drive to my hotel so it took about 1 hr to drive there.

On Tuesday our meeting ended at 3:30 PM EST and my flight out of Newark didn't leave until 6:20. Plenty of time to catch the flight right? WRONG! Here is the Seinfeldesque sequence of events that went down:

The drive from my meeting to Newark. 51.6 miles that should have taken 1 hr and 10 minutes.

• WRONG. There was a monster accident involving numerous big rigs on 95 and the 1 hr drive became 3 hrs and 40 minutes. Yes, almost 4 hrs to drive 50 miles.
• We (me and 2 coworkers) obviously miss our 6:20 flight but we are hoping we can catch ANYTHING out of Newark.
• We get to Newark at 7:15 PM EST. Bad news, we have missed every single plane leaving Newark that would have gotten us back to the Bay Area. Including connections!!
• We call around and find out there is a JetBlue flight flying out of JFK at 8:50 PM into Oakland. Good lord, can we make it? This is how far it is from Newark to JFK (32 miles - 54 minutes according to google maps).

Newark to JFK (32 miles)

• We ask a cabbie how long it will take to get to JFK and he says between 45 minutes and an hour and a half. Shit, it is already 7:30 and the last flight to the bay out of anywhere in New York leaves in 1 hr and 20 minutes.
• But we go for it! We jump in the cab and the cab driver goes warp speed to JFK. He is swerving through cars like an F1 racer. We come across an accident (of course) and he maneuvers us expertly through it.
• We make it to the airport at 8:30 EST and the cab costs about $100 bucks. We have 20 minutes before the plane leaves!!
• We do the mad airport sprint to the JetBlue counter. We don't even have tickets yet!
• We beg and plead for them to let us buy tickets. The absolutely AMAZING JetBlue agent calls the gate (the plane is boarding already) and asks for permission. They say OK but we need to HURRY!
• We buy the tickets right on the spot and the attendant says: "You're not going to make it unless I run with you"
• She hops over the counter and screams: "Run run run"
• We are SPRINTING through the airport weaving through other passengers who are just staring at us in awe.
• We get to security and the JetBlue attendant brings us right to the front of the line and hustles us in. All the time yelling: "hurry hurry hurry". I'm oddly reminded of my highschool girlfriend.
  
• I put all my stuff on the Xray machine, take off my shoes and belt and get through the scanner.
• I glance at my watch: 8:48.
• I come out to pick up my goods to have the JetBlue agent yell in my ear: "hurry hurry hurry..the plane is about to close the doors. You don't have time to put on your belt" (once again, reminded of my highschool girlfriend)
  
• I grab everything haphazardly and we all start sprinting to the gates.
• My pants are literally falling down because I didn't have time to put on my belt
• All along the way, more JetBlue attendants are just yelling at us: "RUN RUN RUN"
• We get to the gate and it's still open! The lady at the gate of course yells: "Hurry, get to the plane fast!"
• We get to the plane..and we MAKE IT!

*WHEW*

The moment we walk on the plane..dripping with sweat, my pants falling down, we're out of breath and the entire plane is staring at us...they close the door.

I check my watch: 8:50

Just on fucking time!

The flight is a long 6 hr flight that unfortunately brings us to Oakland. Great..my car is at SFO (30 miles away)

(Oakland airport to SF Airport - 30 miles)

A coworker rents a car (that takes a while to get) and drives me to SFO for me to get my car and FINALLY drive home.

Here's the final tally:

- I leave to the airport at 3:30 PM EST (12:30 PST)
- I walk into my house a little after 2 am PST

THIRTEEN AND A HALF HOURS TO GET HOME!!

All for a 2 hour meeting.

We better win this F'n deal.

Being a naked man

Seeing all these pictures of myself 1/2 naked with other STRAIGHT men (here and here) has made me wonder:

"What is acceptable [straight] male nude behavior"?

Personally, I have this thing where I take off my shirt as much as possible. It's not like I'm showing off my body because I really have the upper body of a 13 year old that is about to hit puberty (no armpit hair and all)

But I find when I am at home (and probably too frequently in public) I just can't wait to be topless. Go figure. Nalin, my roommate of 6+ years is probably just glad I'm not walking around completely naked.

My first analysis of nude male behavior is focused around nakedness in the gym locker room.

Ah the gym. Where other men show off their wieners with open abandon. There are 3 types of nude behavior in men's locker rooms. I call them: pinky-dicks, average-joes and the show-offs.

Pinky-dicks
This classification of men are the guys in the changing room who will never ever expose their penis. It's not that they necessarily have pinky sized dicks...but I'm assuming that is the reason 80% of them act this way (hence the categorization). I'm guessing the remaining 20% are just a bit gun-shy and don't want other guys to see their packages.

Pinky-dick behavior is classified as:

• Walking to and from the shower with a towel wrapped around them
• Wrapping the towel around their waist when they change their pants and underwear
• Stepping into shower stalls with their towels on, closing the curtain and then removing the towel
• When finished showering, you see a hand come from the side of the curtain, reach around blindly for their towel and then dry themselves off in the stall while the curtain is closed. They exit the stall of course wearing their towel wrapped tightly around their waist.

I'm not being critical of guys who act this way. It's more an observation.

Average-joes
I think I fall into this category at the gym. We are the guys of likely average penis size and girth who are comfortable with our nudity but don't necessarily need to show it off. I think our typical behavior is

• We walk from the lockers to the showers with the towel wrapped around our waists
• We take off our towels before entering shower stalls but we enter the stall quite quickly after disrobing
• We don't wrap the towel around our waists when we change underwear, but we do try and show our balls and packages for as little time as possible

I consider this fairly normally behavior and would estimate about 60-70% of male gym patrons act this way. Of course I think this is normal because it's how I act.

Show-offs
Now this bunch is a whole other story. These are the guys that want to be naked as much as f@cking possible it's actually offensive. Some of the "show-offs" are guys with Dirk Diggler donkey dicks and clearly are saying: "Hey..check out how huge my cock is". Honestly, if I had a 12 inch hammer I might act this way too.

But, I've also seen "show-offs" that had pinky-dicks. Which is odd..because if I had a penis so small you couldn't see it through my pubes, I certainly wouldn't be showing that fact off.

Plain and simple, these guys walk around naked constantly. CONSTANTLY. I have seen some of this behavior from "Show-offs":

• Walk to the shower naked with the towel wrapped around his shoulders
• Oggles themselves in the communal bathroom mirrors fully naked
• Get dressed by putting on their socks, then shirts, then finally their underwear
• Do the "rub-the-towel-vigorously-between-their-legs" technique. You know the one I'm talking about...one hand in front, one hand in back and then a sawing motion back and forth.

Wait. It gets worse. I have even seen some of this EXTREME naked behavior that I think is clearly socially unacceptable:

• There was this guy at my old gym that would sit on the bench and then lube and moisturize his cock and balls in front of everyone...VIGOROUSLY
• Another guy at my old gym was a total donkey dick show off. He would stand naked in front of the mirror while he was shaving, but his cock was so large he actually put it on the counter and it would dip into the sink a bit while he shaved. NASTY! (and incredibly unhygienic)
• Another guy would do STRETCHES naked in the change room. I'm talking bending over and touching his toes style stretches. Dude, don't ever point your open asshole at another guy in public.
• In highschool, we had this one guy who would stand naked 1 inch behind you while you were sitting and changing...he would then say something to make you turn your head around and you would literally turn your head into his balls. This guy HAD to be gay (not that there is anything wrong with that)
  

And no, I don't stare at guys packages while I am in the change room all day. But I go to the gym a lot and unless you walk staring at the ceiling you can't help but to see dicks.

So clearly, the "Show-offs" above I think exhibit non-acceptable social naked behavior. But what am I going to say to them? "Dude, would you please cover up your johnson?" Now that would just be awkward...

Turkey weekend poker

I had the PLEASURE of spending 5 days in Vegas for Thanksgiving..and it..was...AWESOME.

But I have never not had a good time in Vegas, so no real surprise there. Here are the blog posts for my last 3 Vegas trips:

• Halloween 2004 : Infamous 100/100 Weekend -
• April 28 2005 : Mitch, Evan and I take Vegas by Storm
• Labor Day 2005 : Poker and Craziness

It was Thanksgiving weekend in Vegas and we had a giant feast at Tonys.

• 2 turkeys (one deep fried! soooo juicy)
• Prime Rib
• Ham
• Deep fried duck
• Enough sides to feed an army

The feast was so delicious and I literally ate Thanksgiving leftovers about 9 times over the course of the weekend.

My blog has been full of "nightlife stories" recently, so I'm going to keep this post poker focused. After all, it is Vegas and I've been short on poker tales recently.

Poker Highlights
From Thursday night to Sunday afternoon I played about 24 hours of poker. Every night, after a night of clubbing (or turkey dinner) we played till around 6 am. I would then go home, sleep for 2 hours and then go back to the casino to play in a No-Limit (NL) tournament that started at 9 or 10 am. This went on for 3 nights in a row...needless to say... I was tired and burned out at the end.

1. My First Money Finish in a tournament
I played my first tourney of the weekend Friday morning at 9 am. I was the only one motivated enough to wake up and go play at the Silverton. It was a 30 person No-limit tourney. I've been playing a lot of tourneys on party poker recently, so my NL game has been pretty sharp. The tourney paid out the top 3 spots ($500, $300, $200). I made the final table (10 peeps) and I was pretty excited...this was my first final table in a tournament. The field quickly thinned down to 5 of us. When it got down to 5...one guy looked at all of our stacks, and oddly almost all 5 of us were even stacked. This is a bit rare for NL tourneys. Normally you have 1 or 2 enormous stacks. But right now, all 5 of us had pretty even stacks. So we ended up just stopping the play and chopped up the pot evenly among the 5 of us. So I won $200. It would have been fun to play till the end..but it's hard to turn down guaranteed money. Plus I have only slept 2 hours and have been playing poker for about 9 hours in the last 12 hours...so stopping there did my body some good.

I ended up in playing in 2 more tourneys. Saturday's tourney I made the final table again and finished 6th. Shit...the top 4 made money in this one. Sooo close. Sunday I got knocked out about 12th. I was grinding it out when a guy sucked me out with a bloody 6-9 suited to catch a straight. Bastard. Nalin finished 2nd in Sunday's tourney playing VERY solid poker and won about $500.

2. Palms No-limit
On Saturday night after a long night of drinking at Rain, Aaron, Nalin and I played some 2/5 NL at the Palms. I have gone on some great runs playing at the Palms and Sat was no exception. I played real solid and won over $800 in 2 hours. Woo hoo!

3. Best Hand I Have Ever played (or worst...)?
I think I played one of my best hands ever at the Palms on that Saturday. This is how the hand went down:

• I've got about $350 in front of me and I am dealt 4-4 in early position
• I raise to 20 dollars
• Only one person calls
• The flop comes: 8, 7, 2 - this is known as a rag flop
• I bet another 20 dollars. My pair of 4's is pretty weak, but I try and steal the pot by betting aggressively
• The guy who called my earlier raise just stares at me for a while. And he raises me another 60 dollars. This would be the 3rd time I have raised and the guy re-raised me. The first 2 times he managed to get me to fold. I just SENSE that he is trying to steal this pot again. I feel like he thinks I must only have AK or AQ and I am just firing at the pot.
• I stare right back at this guy and I re-raise him another $100
• I am fully expecting him to fold..but he doesn't, he calls!
• At this point, I think shit...I'm done and have probably lost this hand...that is until I notice that he didn't look happy to call.
• The turn comes and it's a Jack
• I check and the guy checks too! If he bet all in I probably would have folded. He showed some real weakness here.
• The river comes and it's an inconsequential card.
• I bet all in (my last $150 or so)
• The guy looks at me and stares at me for a while.
• He calls...and I literally GROAN at the table. I was really hoping for him to fold.
• I flip over my pocket 4's...
• The guy SWEARS out loud and mucks his cards! He didn't have shit!

My guess is he had pocket 3's and was hoping that I really had nothing. This guy f@cked himself on this hand...but I'm just impressed that I read that he had nothing properly. Ended up doubling up to about $700 on this hand.

4. Harold and Kumar
Friday night NL at the Silverton was one of my strangest nights of poker...EVER. First, Aaron, Nalin and I are just blitzed and in SUPER obnoxious mode. We are the worst to play with when we are this way because we are just so incredibly annoying. Every time I would win a hand, I would cackle out loud and rub the chips all over my face. God...how lame of me. But in the peak of our fun..this guy says to Nalin and I:

Guy: "Hey you guys look like Harold and Kumar"
Nalin and I: *silence*
Another Guy: "Hahaha...that's so funny, you guys do look like Harold and Kumar"
Will: Yeah...it is pretty funny...if you are RACIST

That's right, I pulled the race card. Actually, Nalin and I normally find it pretty funny when people call us Harold and Kumar. In fact we were about to dress up as them for Halloween. But in our drunken state, Nalin and I got so pissed off. And we continued to call these 2 guys racist bastards all night.

Harold and Kumar


Harold and Kumar?

The testosterone and the tension started to rise...which leads us to more tension:

5. All In Fold
Shortly after the Harold and Kumar incident, Nalin gets AJs and raises. A guy goes all-in (with about $130) and Nalin calls his all in. All of a sudden we hear the other guy say:

Hey...where are my cards??

Believe it or not, the dealer took his cards by accident! Hahahahahahaha. And rules are rules, even if it's the dealers fault, if you get your cards taken away you lose the pot. So Nalin won an all-in call without even having to show his hand! The guy who lost his money and hand was the same guy who called us Harold and Kumar, so I was loving this moment

But understandably he was FURIOUS! He started screaming at the dealer and then at the pit boss. We all just kind of started laughing in his face. The pit boss pulls him over to the poker counter to try and calm him down.

We continue to hear this guy yell at the pit boss when all of a sudden:

BAM BAM BAM - Steve the pit boss slams his hands on the counter loud 3 times and SCREAMS: SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP!!! ALL OF YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP!!

The room goes silent.

We turn to each other in awkward silence like when you are in a restaurant and you hear an angry mom just yell at her kids at the top of her lungs in public.

The pit boss then takes the bitter loser outside to deal with him. And honestly, I feel a bit bad for the guy...but that's what you get for being racist. :)

6. The Escort Out
Believe it or not, it's still the same Friday night at the Silverton. This is how our night ended:
- I yell over to a dealer at another table that we want her to come back and deal at our table
- This ass clown at her table says something stupid back to me
- I say: "Shut up #6, was I even talking to you" (#6 being the spot he was sitting at the table).
- He then holds up a stack of chips to intimidate me. He holds up about $13! Our table laughs and we tell him that his 13 dollars isn't scaring us.
- He then stands up and challenges me to a 1:1 game for a HUNDRED THOUSAND DOLLARS. What? Huh? The guy is playing 2/4 Limit and we are playing 1/2 NL. NONE of us are high rollers and this guy just looks ridiculous right now.
- Aaron, Nalin and I now all tell this guy to shut the hell up and come play at our table if he thinks he's so good
- Steve the pit boss comes back and tells us all to calm down...Steve's had a hard night, so we give him his due respect and stop our obnoxious ways
- About an hour later, this guy is leaving with his girlfriend and on his way out he says something obnoxious to our table
- I stand up and tell him to shut up and just play with us if he isn't chicken shit (oh yeah, i pulled out some real grade school throw downs this night...sheesh)
- He then AGAIN challenges me to a 1 hand $100k game. Our entire table is laughing at him hysterically
- I'm still standing and he walks right up to me and we just begin BARKING at each other. Our faces are about 2 inches apart.
- Next thing I know Aaron stands up and then Nalin stands up..uh oh, could be trouble...when all of a sudden I turn around and we are suddenly SURROUNDED by 7 security guards. WHOA! That was quick...
- Steve the pit boss comes over and says: "I'm sorry guys, that's it..I'm going to have to ask you to leave". And when you are surrounded by 7 security guards it's not something you can really argue about.
The funny part, not only were we asked to leave but we were escorted out of the casino. They actually walked us to our car to make sure we got in and left.

Yay!! Grade school fun! I was actually back at the casino in about 3 hours for another tournament and they let me back in.

That's all the poker stories. So I thought I would end this post with a recap of the weirdest story of the weekend (poker or otherwise).

The Ride
After we were escorted out of the Silverton we all headed back to Tony's for a bit. It was about 6:30 am and the sun was just coming up. Aaron amazingly had a 9 am meeting he had to get to so after a few laughs at Tony's it's time for him to go back to his hotel. This is how it all went down:

Aaron: Alright, I'm leaving guys
Nalin: Um..how are you getting home?
Aaron: I'll just go walk and catch a cab
Nalin: You should call a cab to come here
Aaron: No, it's cool..I'm sure I'll find one on the street

NOTE: Tony lives in the suburbs. It's now 7 am on a Saturday morning. There is absolutely no chance Aaron will catch a cab just walking the streets. He starts walking and quickly realizes this. So what does he do? He starts hitchhiking!! No f'n way...

So he sticks his thumb out and amazingly enough someone stops to pick him up. Aaron's a relatively clean cut looking kid. But would you pick up a random dude who is wearing clubbing clothes in the middle of the suburbs at 7 am in the morning? The following conversation ensues:

Aaron: Hey, thanks for stopping, where you headed?
Driver: uhhh..just driving around
Aaron: *thinking this guys looks a little fucked up*
Driver: where you going?
Aaron: Bellagio
Driver: well, if you want to pay me gas money I'll drive you there
Aaron: For real? Cool. *jumps in sketchy truck*
Driver: so 2 bucks cool?
*NOTE: it is about a 25 dollar cab ride from the strip to Tonys.*
Aaron: Oh yeah, for sure man. *Aaron later gives him a WHOLE 5 dollars for his trouble*
Aaron: So what are you doing just driving around?
Driver: You know, just kind of coming down from my high
Aaron: Um..ok. High from what?
Driver: A little weed and a little rock
Aaron: *silence*

Hahahaha..the guy was literally a CRACK HEAD.

Aaron got picked up hitch hiking by a crack head who only charged him $2 for what would have been a 25 dollar cab ride. Only in Vegas baby....love this town.

Looking at it will make you fat

I made this sandwich the other day, and I wanted to share the masterpiece with you all.

Click to enlarge and salivate

Oh yeah! I don't F around when it comes to spam and sandwiches. That's right...Spam. V, I was thinking of you when I made this.

What's in this work of art that would cause gastric-masturbation?

Bottom Deck

• Mayo
• Ham deli meat
  
• Turkey deli meat
• Cheddar cheese (none of that pre-sliced shit, I mean thick wedges off the block cheddar)
• Fried spam (about 6 sliced and friend pieces)
  

Top Deck

• More mayo
• Ketchup
• 2 Fried eggs
• More cheddar cheese
• More mayo

This of course was accompanied by good ole BBQ chips.

Toast, merge, eat, and then one rub one out. Enjoy....

Drunk-Will-Pretends-To-Be-Hit-By-A-Car game explained

I've gotten a couple of requests to elaborate more on my near arrest and the great game I play called: "Drunk-Will-Pretends-To-Be-Hit-By-A-Car".

Here are the steps to play the game:

1. Have a drink or two.
   
2. When leaving a club, make sure you are on a street where traffic moves relatively slowly. This is normally easy during club closing time because people are filling the streets in general and this slows cars down.
3. As a car approaches, slowly start crossing the street. KEY: do not look at the car, pretend you don't notice it
4. Let the car pass you
5. Right when the car is about to pass you, slap it hard with your hand and then flip in the air
6. Stay lying on the ground. There are 2 preferred techniques here. a) Motionless. This is fun, because the audience and driver assumes death. b) Twitch. This is fun, because the audience and driver assume great amounts of pain and possible paralysis.
7. After a few seconds, bounce up really quick, dust yourself off like nothing happened and recite one of the following lines:

1. Calmly: "Phew, close one" *dust self off*
   
2. Screaming: "Oh my god, did you just see what happened? I can't believe that car hit me"

Wheeee! Choose one of the above quotes based on the crowd around you. Some crowds prefer theatrics more then others. When you are in a ghetto crowd, the reaction is great. It's like you just did a pass-off-a-guys-balls-while-dancing-ending-with-a-reverse-dunk on an And-1 mixtape. Everyone just starts jumping up and down, screaming such common phrases as:

"Oh snap..no he didn't just do that"
"Dude, that was dope"
"Hommie, that was some crazy shit"
"Yo yo yo..do it again brutha"

It's probably why I play this game so much. For the fans. I do become a bit of an attention-whore sometimes.

I have probably played this game literally about a dozen times. Not a single time has a car ever stopped. There was once at 11th and Folsom when I did it and the car slowed down and then VERY quickly peeled away.

NOT this weekend though. Here are some pics of what I described here.

Corner of Columbus and Broadway. Hit this car and flipped kind of hard. Have a huge bruise on my hip. I stayed lying on the ground for a while until I heard the car actually stop and the door open...uh oh.


Angry driver questioning why I hit his car. My answer: "I'm dumb and I'm sorry". Side note, thanks for backing me up Andy. Glad to know that if this guy wanted to throw down you would have been there taking pictures...ass wipe.


(Very quickly, 2 cop cars pull up and I get lectured and threatened with arrest. Nothing really happens except they take down my info)

Wheeeeeeeeeeee! So I'm honestly on the fence of whether I continue to play this game or not. What do you all think? Risk vs. Reward?

Dry skin dilemma

I go to the bathroom this morning to get some moisturizer cause my skin is insanely dry right now.

Uh-oh, it's not there.

I take a peak in Nalin's room. Oh no...it's beside his bed.

I think my skin is better left dry...i'm not touching that bottle.

Evan is doing my job for me....

Wow.

Was this past weekend crazy. Really crazy. Really really crazy.

I was going to write a great post on it (I still owe one from my Thanksgiving in Vegas..1/2 done it) but Evan beat me to it. So I'll just refer to his blog here (he has 4 separate SF posts):

http://www.pondrings.com/emh/

Perma link to SF posts: http://www.pondrings.com/emh/index.jsp?tag=san%20francisco

Enjoy!

The only detail Evan really left out was the fact that I almost got arrested on Friday night. I have this trick I do when I've had a few too many drinks. It's called: "Drunk-Will-Pretends-To-Be-Hit-By-A-Car". It's a really fun game. I do it all the time. The car I did it to didn't think it was so funny (the North Beach crowd loved it though). The cops didn't think it was so funny either. All of a sudden I have 2 cop cars U-Turn and pull up beside me. Our conversation:

Officer: Why did you hit that car?
Will: Because I'm stupid sir.
Officer: *tries to suppress his laughter...at which point I figured I wouldn't get a ticket"
Officer: Give me your ID
Officer: *takes down all my details*
Officer: What do you do for a living?
Will: I'm a director at a software company.
Officer: Really? You think being arrested will look good on your resume?
Will: *gulp...i think i pooped my pants a bit here* no sir.
Officer: OK, then get out of here and I better not still see you here in 5 minutes
Will: *phew*

Hoooray! Still a clean record!

Becoming an Ironman...or at least 1/2 of one

It's official.

I just signed up for the Wildflower 1/2 Ironman Triathlon.

That is a:
- 1.2 mile swim
- 56 mile bike
- 13.1 mile run

Yikes.

Looks like I'm going to be busy training the next 5 months.